Family Photo Shoot

My mum has always been in love with taking pictures for some reason and it has now become a family tradition to have a family photo shoot every Christmas break. Its really like a dress up party cause my mother makes us all wear the same colors. This year it was orange, yellow (I rebelled and wore blue lmao instead of yellow). Anyway, the official photos aren't out but my dad took a few from the side with his camera.

Orange.

My brother and I do look so much alike.

I look like such a baby.

Me in my mum's dress.

My belle sister, Karis.

And then my webcam didn't sleep that night.

Christmas

Christmas didn't end up being as uneventful as I anticipated. We attended a few dinners with family friends and then we took a family trip to Hungary. The hotel was fantastic and the city was quite pretty at night. I was grumpy the whole time so I didn't take a lot of pictures but I took amazing ones of my sister, Karis, with my dad's Cannon.

Before a family dinner. My mum said crazy pose and well..

Karis and Dr Martens. 

Ma mere!!

My mother and sister. Taken by my dad.

K's smile is belle.

I took this one of her.

And this one also.

Heroes square, Budapest. Taken by my dad. 

Don't remember where this was. Taken by my dad.

The statue by our hotel. Taken by my dad.

Chain Bridge at night. Beautiful! Taken by my dad.

UPDATES! UPDATES! COMING UP NEXT!!

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!!

I hope everyone loved their presents xx

A friend of mine likes this picture so you know what? I decided to share!!
Tis the season after all.

If you didn't get anything for christmas, here's my gift to you, enjoy:

Art

"Whoever uses the spirit that is in him creatively is an artist. To make living itself an art, that is the goal."

- Henry Miller

Psalm 127:1

Unless the LORD builds the house,
   the builders labor in vain.
Unless the LORD watches over the city,
   the guards stand watch in vain.

Fancy seeing this on tumblr.

Movies Update

After realizing yesterday wasn't Thursday, I went to see 'MI4 - Ghost Protocol' with my siblings. The movie was more than GREAT. Tom Cruise was bad-ass, as usual. The comedy and action were on point. My favorite character, that was not Ethan Hunt, was the "Analyst" William Brandt (Jeremy Renner) . It was also 100% decent which I was pleased about because I took my 10 year old sister with me. I give it an A- because the lead female (Paula Patton) was pissing me off.

Next up: 'Sherlock Holmes 2 - A Game Of Shadows'. Unfortunately, I can't watch it today like I previously planned to BECAUSE, its not out in Vienna until next WEDNESDAY!! Share my frustration? I can literally not wait though. Sadly, I can't even watch it on the 22nd because it's the last day of school and I have other things planned. I'll just have to watch it on Thursday.

PS. I am so not here for Warners Bros. releasing 'New Year's Eve' when it's not even Christmas. That's just beyond stupid. I guess their scared nobody will watch it on on the actual New Year's Eve.

Movie weekend.

Recently, I find that I have nothing to do with my time. Therefore, I declare this weekend, starting tomorrow, a watch-as-many-movies-as-you-can weekend. Starting with MI4 tomorrow, The Help on Friday and Sherlock Holmes 2 on Saturday. The list is still under construction but I can assure you that by the time I am done with that cinema, they will give me an award for most valued customer.
PS. Golden Globe nominations came out today. Whoop. This year I am gonna blog my predictions.

My tumblr!

I love my tumblr these days. Its filled with every thing I love, take a look at how beautiful it is:

http://mercedeso.tumblr.com/

I spy, JD!!
Btw, December is such a busy month: too many birthdays even Jesus'. Anyway, shout out to my buds Moira & Abu. Happy birthday again loves, I love you guys.

Happy Birthday E ♥

Eloghosa Osunde
the Best-est Best Friend in the world.

Judge Me

Judge the whispered breaths between words of determination,
neglecting the pleas of a friend on one line while death is on hold on the other,
Because love wasn't enough to make him hang up and pause the world from
free falling until it all went black.

Judge the powdered layers upon that beautiful face,
used to mask out what's real like a professional masquerade, blame it on the insecurities felt from years of neglect and words of rejection reminding her that wasn't good enough to feel pretty.

Judge the fact that her tee-shirt sleeves resemble the Nile,
a sweeping length of cloth covering up scars she spent hours trying to align and place in orderly fashion,
so that blood flows away in organised tributaries of pain.

Judge the laughter bouncing about in your ears like turbulent planes, resulting in
confusion at the misplaced identities of lame jokes but you won't know
the number of oxygen masks required to keep a pillow alive every night.

Judge the various excuses that are dropped like bombs in Iraq each
time you ask to come over to a house where drunkard father
and a bastard child remain hidden in armoured tanks called secrets.

Judge the protrusions of her ribs through stomach muscles that
have been forced in on a regular basis like a kidnapped child
being raped by the anorexic fingers of a teenage girl.

Judge his obsession to nail biting. Like a crack-head he can't do without
his daily drug because unlike you, there is a countdown
playing in the background and cancer is the examiner waiting by the clicking clock for him to submit his life.

And then you can judge me, for always having a reason for every abnormality,
informally accepted as an anomaly, because I always choose to see the good in people,
but judge yourself first, for taking up a role nobody gave you the script for.

Inspiration

I envy the way
inspiration just comes and slaps
men across the face,
rudely;
without any regard for who they may be.

I find it oddly profound
how she storms in through the doors
of your mind,
without remembering to knock or
to even inform you of her visit

And she doesn’t leave.
No, she lays on you like roses on mahogany caskets and
Her every move is tactfully calculated to produce results,

In form of
Wholesome ballads about the expired hearts of ex-lovers,
Which may or may not have led
To the premature death of

Love,
or
massive expanses of blue skies and
Blinding yellow sun sets between
juxtapositions of purple and grey and rhymes in unspoken

Poetry,
or
A criminally evasive painting hanging beside
its artist's elaborate description in bullet points
piercing your mind with confusion because really,
all you can see is a dot but they say its

Art,
and
the sweet movements of muscles
betraying the direction of the wind
as sweat beads erupt like volcanoes
but the beauty remains surreal
so just

Dance.
As inspiration sits before you
luring you with her presence and
Waiting for you to do with her as you wish
but watch as she draws you in.

Because sometimes,
when you get close enough
to smell her breath in your lungs
or to taste her lips on your tongue.

Close enough
to hear her voice in your mind
or to feel her scent on your skin.

Yes, I mean close enough,
so that you can even hear the sudden rush
of tidal waves
sending signals to your brain;
A billion ideas.

Inspiration leaves you;

you'll never get to catch the rose petals
as they fly away with the wind.

18 = SWAG!

OMG!!! IM FINALLY 18!!!!!! This shxt Craaayyyyy!

Rumor Has It/Someone Like You

Glee has blown my head off! Literally.
I just watched the Santana/Mercedes cover of the Adele songs: Rumor Has It and Someone Like You and I cried. It was too captivating, Santana wowed me. Mercedes always Wow's me but their voices together? Heavenly. Im on #teamtroubletones now, forget the New Directions!!

Free!!

Im done with my SATs!!!!
Finally.

I was so exhausted after I finished on Saturday that I just came back home and crashed. I pretty much slept this weekend even though I had a ton of school work to do. Oh well.

I also watched the Glee episode: Pot O' Gold andddddd I'm in love with that Rory Flanagan (Damian Joseph McGinty Jr, winner of the Glee Project) character's voice. His voice is amazing! I especially enjoyed his "Take Care of Yourself" cover; I almost cried. I can't wait for Samuel Larson to come on Glee now that Ive seen what Damian can do. I still can't believe he's only 19!! He's talented. Okay, enough glee, I can go on for hours.

Im freeee. I have mocks in January though -_-
I have to start studying soon.
Much love xo

My top 10 songs right now.

1. Anything - P-square
2. Voodoo - Naeto C
3. Say it with me - Chris Brown
4. Don't tell me you love me - Big Sean
5. Oh my love - Chris Brown
6. Princess of China - Coldplay ft Rihanna ( A Chichi & Mercedes Song )
7. Asamkpokoto - P-square
8. Next 2 you - Chris Brown ft Justin Bieber 
9. So much more - Big Sean
10. Olofofo - Iceprince ft Wizkid

Excited

I just found out that Immortal, Michael Jackson's next album, will be released on the 21st of November!! Only a day before my birthday. I think I'm such a lucky fan because last year Michael Jackson's Vision was released on my birthday. I'm really excited at the moment, I'm gonna pre-order it now.

MJ buzz

There has been a lot of talk about Michael Jackson lately with his doctor being tried and all. I decided to go through all my favorite pictures of him and thought why not share?

Dancing Nigerian Cop.

Check this video out, it is hillarious!!

Insecure Girl

Insecure girl,
Your confident walk,
Pulls the curtains so the majority do not witness what goes on behind your mask.

Insecure girl,
I know how you feel,
goodbye kisses have a way of leaving a mark on the faces of the heartbroken.

Insecure girl,
You choose to fall far from the flock and follow a black sheep.
Its no wonder you feel lost.

Insecure girl,
Your 100 euro bobby brown may hide the black spots on your forehead
But the story remains written all over your face in permanent ink.

Insecure girl,
You passive smoker,
You watch as others govern the kingdom of your mind.

Insecure girl,
It makes me laugh when I hear you talk like your mama never forbade your use of such language.
You naïve fool, you think it makes you sound wise.

Insecure girl,
Didn't your mother also tell you of how she spent 9 months forcing courage down her umbilical cord?
Yet you walk around like shattered glass.

Insecure girl,
I hope you read this and know I'm talking about you
because I really want you to know you're bigger than you think.

...

      

Hope. Peace. Love.

18

The time has finally come. Well, soon.
I'm going to be 18!!
To be honest, there's only one thing I wish I could do for my birthday: spend it with 4 specific people but unfortunately they are all in completely different cities so I guess I could scrap that thought.
Anyway, I can't think of anything I want to do instead to celebrate. Yet.
I do know what I want however, for now at least: A sketchpad + pencils + New MJ calendar. Random. I know. But I just feel like I haven't done any drawing lately, might as well use my talent.

Did I mention I finally got Maroon 5 tickets???

I can't wait for the concert!!
Its exactly a day before my best friends birthday so she is most likely going to receive a rowdy birthday phone call from me. But that's too bad lol.

I run

I run,
For a living.
At the pace of the heart beats of those singing psalms with open arms and whose naked eyes release tears that erase the ink notes of their lives.
Through vast fields filled with mines and sounds of bomb blasting echoes in my soul playing in the background.
In a race filled with glittering options with piercing voices that leave your mind speechless and make it difficult to walk around blindfolded.

I run,
Towards the invisible finish line that resembles the frown lines on the faces of people who disapprove of my life.
People who think they can map your path out with the paint leftover on their ears that stay laying with walls hoping to hear the latest word on the streets.
I find it impossible to imagine that I wake up everyday to my "Mirror mirror on the wall" only to see a face and walk away convinced I'd seen myself.
Because it seems fair to them to think that I've metamorphed from little drizzles on a withering autumn day to snowflakes on a beautiful summer morning.

I run,
Through a maze built by ravenous souls in lust for unsent love letters handwritten in cursive because we would rather satisfy our flesh first.
I remember how your hands directed elongated symphonies as your fingers travelled to and fro my naked body in search of a ravishing spot to hide.
And the unspoken words you sang through the endless seas of blue in your eyes remain as permanent tattoos in my dislocated mind.
And that goodbye kiss that poisoned my insides led to my eternal numbness because I've been inflicted by your kind ever since like the vibrations of sounding raindrops in my thighs call to them.

I run,
Away from maximum security prisons where the pain I have spelt out in dairies are locked away. But they escape from my tongue while my spirit tries to converse with my Maker's causing me to run away ashamed. And then my heart fills with exclamation marks screaming STOP!
I need. this pain. to stop.
Binding my future in shackles, causing my skin to bleed as it cries for freedom.
I need it to STOP using walls the height of Mt. Kilimanjaro to block away the peace that should come from Him, because they are only playing hard to get.
To STOP doing cartwheels in my eyes making my tears envious so they fall down my face as they cry.

I run,
Through hallways of past mistakes and a series of unfortunate circumstances, waving my hands frantically in an attempt to signal the author, shouting
"Hey, you can stop writing this now"
Because the darkness became too dark for me and I care not for the delicate intricacies that go down in the mind of one about to take that final jump.
And I've grown impatient waiting to see the words "Happily Ever After" on the following page
Because all I see is white lie after white lie marking the roads that lead to destruction because my life has long been affected by the black deaths of hope and hands brought together in Holy matrimony while unholy lips attempted to kiss heaven.

See

I run,
Because all I see are the torn pages of a diary once kept up to date, slit flesh from nights I swore my voice had been muted because the fervent prayers I said through parted lips did not cause the heavens to open up and rain volumes of blessings, and a broken heart someone is yet to fix.
I run through tunnels of dreams and lose my breath because the air surrounding me is filled with the words I've failed to embrace as weapons in this battle before death.
Words when called together in assembly will read:
"The race is not to the swift nor is this battle for the strong"

- Mercedes

Inhale, exhale.

I've had a rough week and it has mostly involved change and compromise. I have made some drastic changes and I don't feel any form of regret thankfully; at least that means I'm doing the right thing(s). 

In my life, I've learned the hard way that it is important to let things go. It's time for me to finally breathe, to exhale. I did a little confessional-type-thing in a poem I haven't quite found an appropriate title for. It was originally meant for the Femme Fatale blog I told you I was a part of but somehow we didn't post anything again this week. 

We were meant to write something about ourselves and it turned into a means for me to let go of everything I had been holding in for some time now, actually, a really long time. I hope it doesn't become one of those poems that ends up being misconstrued, but whatever right? 

Beauty fades; that's why it's what's inside that counts. 

ELI is finally herreeee.

ELI finally came out. I was very excited especially because my mama bought me the album from notjustok.com so I didn't feel left out ^_^

I really liked the album because it was really personal to Iceprince and also because Ive waited so long for it. The album launch concert was apparently crazy. Sad thing I could not be there live :( 

I have a lot of favorites: Wussup Wussup, See Myself, Magician, End of Story and Thank You.

My TOP favorite is Olofofo however and I would like to share it with you guys; its been on replay form 3 days now. Wizkid's bit is beautiful and Jesse Jagz killed the end with those chords. Enjoy:

Olofofo - Iceprince ft Wizkid

PS. You can buy the album on both iTunes and notjustok.com. If you're are in Nigeria, buy it in traffic lol!!

Its been a minute ..

I haven't blogged in a while. I have been too busy. Also, because I've had so much to say and I tend to talk too much so I decided to wait it out to avoid boring you to death.

So, I don't know if any of you have ever heard the name 'Frankie Lymon'? He was one of the most amazing singers in the 50s and he started at a really young age. I first heard about him from the movie which was based on his life 'Why do fools fall in love' because we had to watch it in school. This is my favorite song of his:

Goody Goody

Isn't he talented? He didn't really last long because he got into drugs until he OD'd which is why most don't know who he is. I know this is really random but I was watching Glee the other day and Blaine's (Darren Chris) cover of 'Its not Unusual' by Tom Jones totally reminded me of Frankie, don't ask me how. 

Its not Unusual Glee Cover

PS. Glee is really good this season, contrary to my previous expectations for the new season. NO MORE RACHEL BERRY DRAMA! whew. She pisses me off. Now, its about everybody: Mercedes, Mike, Brittany and so on. Glee is keeping it less banal. Oooh, and Gossip Girl is also great this season, it's very fresh and Chuck Bass is .... (enough said).

Spoken Word

So I was going through my friend Jasmine's blog and I found this video I'd seen ages ago & really loved but I had lost it :'(

Thankfully, it was on her blog, Yaay! Goes to show you that great minds think alike.

Anyway, it is a spoken word video & it is really deep and utterly relevant to today's world. Enjoy xo

"Ten things I want to say to a black woman" by Joshua Bennett

So, I love this dude ... Pharell.

Pharell Williams is talent. I first fell in love with him in that Gwen Stefani song, because he was just different. Another thing I love about him is his fashion sense, he's very unique, even his voice is unique. He's most definitely one of a kind. My tumblr is literally swamped with photos of him aswell as other people I'm obsessed with so I'm gonna share some of my favorite photos of him that are on my tumblr.

I love his chilled outfit here.

:)

I love how his neck tattoo always shows.

He looks soo HOT here.

James 5:16

"Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective."
- New International Version (NIV)

Phenomenal Woman by Maya Angelou

Pretty women wonder where my secret lies

I'm not cute or built to suit a fashion model's size

But when I start to tell them

They think I'm telling lies.

I say,

It's in the reach of my arms

The span of my hips,

The stride of my step,

The curl of my lips.

I'm a woman

Phenomenally.

Phenomenal woman,

That's me.

I walk into a room

Just as cool as you please,

And to a man,

The fellows stand or

Fall down on their knees.

Then they swarm around me,

A hive of honey bees.

I say,

It's the fire in my eyes

And the flash of my teeth,

The swing of my waist,

And the joy in my feet.

I'm a woman

Phenomenally.

Phenomenal woman,

That's me.

Men themselves have wondered

What they see in me.

They try so much

But they can't touch

My inner mystery.

When I try to show them,

They say they still can't see.

I say

It's in the arch of my back,

The sun of my smile,

The ride of my breasts,

The grace of my style.

I'm a woman

Phenomenally.

Phenomenal woman,

That's me.

Now you understand

Just why my head's not bowed.

I don't shout or jump about

Or have to talk real loud.

When you see me passing

It ought to make you proud.

I say,

It's in the click of my heels,

The bend of my hair,

The palm of my hand,

The need of my care,

'Cause I'm a woman

Phenomenally.

Phenomenal woman,

That's me.

from And Still I Rise by Maya Angelou
copyright © 1978 by Maya Angelou.

51

"African?" they ask.
Yes,
but I am Nigerian.

I am the voice that brings heads together,

as I speak in loud tones, through poetry, 

as I make the opinions of the speechless known.
I let my accent roll off my tongue,
by accident, 

as my voice rises like the dust does in my fatherland.

My heart beats like the talking drums of my ancestors, 

brave like the wrestlers of that time yet pure, 

bursting with severe passion, 

bleeding with an indescribable love, 

and having a thirst for change.

My hands stay open as they touch the lives of the needy through actions of brotherly love, 

and as they wish to know the secrets of the delicious dishes of our women.

My ears reminisce those days it fell asleep to folk tales told by the wise whose faces are adorned with
laugh lines and proud smiles, whose eyes saw visions and lips spoke prophecies.

My mind sleeps in a state of unrest,
harboring thoughts of hope and dreaming of a future that can be attained by a generation of multitalented beings: children who break boundaries and shape universes.

My eyes miss the beauty we possess,
seen in the smiles of people who have little joy in the world. 

Yet they laugh even in deprivation, sing even in trepidation. 

The beauty, that's in the happy way the hips of the dancer sways as our culture comes to life with her every move.

My body moves to the echoes of bomb blasts and clashing cutlasses. 

Stray bullets pierce through my eyes as I read memoirs of those persecuted for standing up for something 

and the cries of the survivors of the many oil explosions play in the background. 

While the fire blazes in my soul as I watch those memories once tucked away reincarnate in our today.

And the color of my skin?
It unites me to my people,
tracing the world map, with dotted lines, the route back home. 

Reminding me of seeds I must sow, in memory of my roots that define me, wherever I go.

I am Nigerian,
a reason to be proud,
Proud that after 51 years, we keep growing strong, we keep growing free.

Another Poem I wrote for Femme Fatale

Mama Said ..

My mama told me of times like these,

Of days he will smile at me and cause that girl in my head to twirl,

so gracefully like an ecstatic yet composed ballerina
and of nights I will let my mind swim with graceful rhythms, 

through unending fantasies only to catch my breath again, 

because my dreams were a bit too 'far fetched'.

Of the times I would dance through unknown forests of beautiful desire, 

blindfolded, 

and feel extreme pleasure. 

She said no one will have to tell me which way to go 

because the right person will hold my hand through the darkness 

but she added that I was never to make it easy; 

she never told me that this would be a difficult task.

Of moments I will feel the effects of a famine 

due to massive droughts, 

in my lungs 

because the air between us will be filled with unwritten love songs. 

She told me to stop the knife from getting too deep too quickly

but I could hardly resist him, 

and as I bled volumes of love,

it was like my brain had reset 

because I could barely remember, 

how to pronounce the word 'NO'.

And so we danced together,

in this vast forest with untangled branches of 'I love yous' 

and non-existent trees of 'goodbyes'. 

He drew maps on bare sand 

and soon I became a skilled bandit in the darkness.

All the while the moon cast shadows of doubt upon us 

but I ignored them

as mama's words became a mere constellation

of stars that painted the night skies,

too far to remember.

Then my near sighted eyes began to see those dreams 

take the shape of dark circles 

that made a shelter beneath them 

as I counted days 

because one night while we dug up layers of gold and silver 

with perspiring backs and over active limbs, 

and retraced our steps through the bushy and now familiar path 

of a thousand 'I'd miss yous', 

we were completely oblivious 

to the fact that we had left something behind,

inside me.

But she warned me.

Of the times I'd be bruised with cold 'Hellos' 

and greeted with excuses each time I needed explanations,

for the unmarked footsteps that tainted our secret trail,

Only to realize I had only been a guest.
Of times when the wind that will cause me to shiver 

will be from unfamiliar waters of "If only's", 

flooding my conscience with regrets, 

that I would never see coming.

Of times my stomach will twist in endless knots of ineffable joy 

trapping little creatures with a million colors.
But that morning was not what she had spoken of; 

my stomach felt like its contents had been curled up in a ball 

and propagated by some undiscovered force

 out my mouth as a sick bland color. 

And at that moment, the butterflies were set free.

Mama said there would be days like this, 

but mama's words could never have taught me this lesson.

Beautiful Imperfection

Beautiful Imperfection is an album by Asa. 

If you remember, I posted something about it in January around the time of its initial release. This time its different! Yes, Asa released the US special edition +2 bonus tracks and it debuted at #5 on the BILLBOARD WORLD ALBUM CHARTS!! I mean how cool is that? I said it before and I'll say it again, I love her, she makes me proud to be Nigerian.

P.S. It was also #3 a few days ago but its now back to #5 :( 

"Powerful vocals that channel Amy Winehouse at her peak… and lyrics that recall Bob Marley and Marvin Gaye"- Teen Vogue.

Baby boy

I felt the innocence
of his soul
in the naivety of his speech,
but I led him on
with my soft yet deceptive nods
while I rendered him my ears.

I watched his fingertips
tremble from the great battle
that was going down in his mind
as he contemplated on what exactly he should,
and shouldn't say
and when I took his palms in mine,
I felt his heartbeat
as it resonated the purity,
in his childish wisdom.

A playful tease danced,
at the tip of my tongue
but I refused to hinder him
from allowing his spirit wander free,
in my presence.

His eyes flickered with fear,
and his troubled face left me
feeling as helpless as I usually do
because the same shackles bind me,
so that we can only offer each other
the comfort that comes with companionship.

I refuse to be the one who will encourage him
to throw away his shorts,
for some pants;
a boy cannot teach a boy,
to be a man.

I would rather sit,
and watch his radiating skin shed
with time and life,
and watch it give way
to the puberty filled skin
of a stressed out teenager.

I would rather kiss my baby
until his brown skin almost turns red 
in a blush,
while I tell him he is the man of my life
and he tells me the only truth I believe 
like the black and white words,
in His book:
'I love you too'.

I love my MAMA!!

The title says it best, I can't describe how I feel any further.
My mother is just the most amazing creature on this earth to me, I can't stop being grateful to God for her, honestly.
I know everyone says this, but for real, "My mama is the best in the world"

♥

Hurt

I'm finally back home!

I was away on a four-day biology trip recently and it was not as horrible as I had anticipated. It was just not fun, especially for me. I have learnt that I am clearly an urban spirit I do not particularly fancy anything that has to do with nature.

We basically did the most random things but all about biology; this part wasn't too bad. The bad parts were the actual locations of the various activities. It was a National Park so there were bugs, mosquitoes, reeds, horses, donkeys, cows, birds (basically an intense dearth of basic civilization) and although the hotel was fantastic we didn't even spend close to half the time in it.

Don't get me started on the food. I just finally know for sure that switching to a healthy eating lifestyle will definitely be tasking for me. All in all, the trip was looking like one I would leave saying "I had fun" until I fell down and twisted my ankle for the first time ever. So now I'm sitting in bed with a sore ankle and an SAT Manual and will probably be like this for the next few days.

Poem I wrote for Femme Fatale

INTERRED

"... cause the way things are going, I'm starting to wonder if we could even try to be friends.."

He handed me my heart.
He held it out to me like that dirty piece of cloth you can't stand to hold on to for another second.
Just like that, in less than 100 characters he sent me his final goodbye.

I sat there like a glass of cold water had just been thrown in my face; I was in shock.
I didn't know what to do with the little smoke cloud of pride that was left after the explosion of my heart.
Please allow me elaborate on what we 'were' in a few sentences or two.

You see, we had that 'unspoken secret' love affair type.
You know the one where he has a girlfriend and you have a boyfriend but you still have that underground type thing? Yes, he was that secret I let caress my tongue each time I gossiped with friends because I would have to hold myself back from letting the cat out.

When we became exclusive, I was that girl he'd skip class for.
We were wild and crazy lovers, our souls seemed perfectly aligned.
I'd stay up at night listening to him whisper insignificant plans for our future and then my mind would actually make out childish fantasies of this life he had described so vividly to me.

But then his friends suddenly became the commentators of our love life. I never knew him to be the type to seek counsel from fools who had hisbest interests lost somewhere in their minds but it turns out he was a fool
because his best friend overfed my phone with messages that enveloped those cheesy 'pick-up lines' that make you cringe or almost puke every other day.

Don't you just hate it when this happens? The same people he trusted were playing darts upon his back and he was oblivious to this fact.
When he sat in front of me, I didn't see him only a spitting image of what all his 'guys' looked like
and that frustrated me until I reached that juncture where I let him do whatever the hell he'd want.

I know I should not have condoned such a mess for that long but honestly, he had me.
That was why I would go to bed releasing the flood gates and my pillow would nearly drown because he did more than I could take.
And those sugar-coated lies he told just to postpone the pain I'd eventually feel were like the inhaler to the asthmatic creature I had become.

Now its all over, my body is suddenly my property again and each place you touched me recites a story of what you felt like.
I yearn to have that feeling again but there is no 'for sale' sign here so you can tell your friends to check the next street.
You handed me my heart so now that too is mine again but left all the memories and they will remain with me, interred deeply in my bones.

Blog Link: http://femmefatale-4.blogspot.com/

Promises

The rate at which human  beings make promises without thinking still amazes me. Making a promise to do something does not make it more likely that you will do that thing. So its not relevant to promise to do something if you're no sure you can.

A friend of mine just moved to America and had promised to call me when he got there. Not that I cared if he called or not since we could still talk some other way. I warned him not to promise because he has the best track record for breaking promises but he insisted. And as you must have already guessed, he didn't call and now I'm upset with him.

Moral of the story? Don't make promises you can't keep. Better yet don't promise anything at all whether its a promise to God to to a fellow human, just don't; that is of course unless you're one hundred percent sure you won't break it.

 "It is better to say nothing that to make a promise and not keep it" [Ecclesiastes 5:5]

Change

I have come to accept that everything in life is subject to change. Nothing can stay the same for sure and I guess that's just life. I think people should always learn to embrace change whether it is a major change in your life or someone you know that has changed. Change must always be accompanied with acceptance.

This summer, I changed a whole lot but not in who I am as a person rather in my general outlook on life. It all began when I stumbled upon this quote:

"For everything you have missed, you have gained something else and for everything you gain, you lose something else" - Ralph Waldo Emerson.

In life, you might miss out on a few things but you gain something worthwhile in exchange and sometimes people might perceive this as a changed attitude in you but that shouldn't bother you because always with change you might lose friends or people who don't accept the new you; this is how life sadly is.

I realized that this summer and I really sat down to think about the areas in my life that require change and so far I have been doing a good job. I get scared of trying out new things because I tend to be temperamental which would explain my inconsistency with blogging; this too will change.

I would like to refer to this stage as the 'maturing stage' in my life ("Its about time" my mother would most likely say if she read this.) and I'm loving every bit of it.

Speaking of change, I'm now a part of this other blog that's strictly about being artistic and its been going fantastic even though we've been doing a lot of writing in terms of poetry, prose etc. Anyway, kindly check it out: http://femmefatale-4.blogspot.com/

ELI

Iceprince's debut album 'Everybody Loves Iceprince' finally has a set release date. The wait is over and now all that can be done next is to countdown to the final release date of 7th Oct and the album launch on 9.10.11. I'm very excited and I have very high expectations so I hope the album does good.

Desiderata (Desired things)

Recently, my whole family got together in London for our first offiicial family reunion. It was so much FUN!! But I couldn't help but think about the reason we all exist and that's my GRANDADDY! He's such a cool guy, I love him and all he's about. I remember him telling me about teaching all his kids the poem 'Desiderata' by Max Ehrmann. Its a poem about life and how it should be and you know what? Im gonna learn it too!!

Go placidly amid the noise and haste,
and remember what peace there may be in silence.

As far as possible without surrender
be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly;
and listen to others,
even the dull and the ignorant;
they too have their story.
Avoid loud and aggressive persons,
they are vexations to the spirit.

If you compare yourself with others,
you may become vain or bitter;
for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.

Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.
Keep interested in your own career, however humble;
it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.
Exercise caution in your business affairs;
for the world is full of trickery.
But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;
many persons strive for high ideals;
and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself.
Especially, do not feign affection.
Neither be cynical about love;
for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment
it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years,
gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.
Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline,
be gentle with yourself.
You are a child of the universe,
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God,
whatever you conceive Him to be,
and whatever your labors and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul.

With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful.
Strive to be happy.

Spring Break

Today is the last day of the Spring Break now its back to work all day everyday. Not like I did anything but work this break anyway, so it really makes not difference to me. But its still sad anyway.

What did I get up to this break?
Nothing. All I did was revise for my SATs, kill myself for homework, and slave away.
I did however get to catch up on whats been going on with my friends :D
Usually, I can't skype them often enough due to the time difference issue since that would mean I'd have to stay up to skype them and I can't afford that during the school period. So yeah. I caught up with my friends and that was fantastic. I miss my friends sooooo much :'(

Now before you start thinking I did nothing but work, I didn't. Well for one day that is. I went to the park with Genia and Lisa :D it was really nice. Pictures?

PS. Today is my uncle's birthday! Whoooop!
I got to tell him first, I feel like the best niece in the world right now.
And apparently I got the date of my SATs mixed up smh. It's only members of my family that can mistaken a "7" for a "1". Anyway, I have 6 more days to go. I honestly can't wait for it to be over even though I'll still be taking it again, until then.

In other news.

I have been rather busy. I'm actually meant to be studying right now but hey, 15 minutes of distraction never hurt anybody did it? SATs in 3 days wish me luck guys. Fingers crossed on this one, will really not tolerate failure. Hmmphh.
Iceprince's new single is out. Whooop. Well it came out a few days back but I was gonna wait after my SATs to blog about it but oh well I'm here now right? The single is called Superstar and its really nice, I really like it. You can buy it on iTunes or on http://chocolatecitygroup.com

 

Comment on what you guys think.
My favorite bit:
"Okay my baby lady. Oh so you think I'm fly? Dat shit don't make me crazy, yeah and I'm floating in skies. You like that movie magic. Huhn? cause you got much action. You confident and you cocky and you swag with a passion"
PS. today is the MI2 Album Launch in the UK. I really wish I could go!!! If only I didn't have these exams this weekend. Sigh.

Ba Ni Kidi

Okay so I wanna assume this video came out today, because Darey only tweeted about its release today. Anyway, I JUST WATCHED IT! And I must say, WOW. Like, I am amazed, lost for words, blown outta my mind. I expected the video to be very creative and nice after I saw the trailer/teaser or whatever its even called but I cannot say I expected it to be this amazing, no, I was shocked. It is fantastic and so colorful, its one of a kind really. Darey, has just set standards and raised the bar toooo high.  Like woah. Okay I'm  gonna shut up now but here's the video guys. Watch and enjoy (you will). I mean its impossible not to abi dem no born you well? (for my Nigerians lol). Ill shut up now bye.
"Put ya hand inside your pocket and give us plenty money. Why? I wan buy am for Honda. Why? I wan to go for London"

Happiness

There comes a time in life 

when you have to let go of

all the pointless drama

and the people who create it

and instead surround yourself with

people who make

you laugh so hard

that you forget the bad

and focus solely on the good.

After all,

Life is too short to be

anything but happy.

YMCMB ♥

Drake.
I love him ♥ 

Justin Drew Bieber
He looks so cool wow.